


Wasted Beauty

by galaxyhitchiker



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Spoilers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Guilt, M/M, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Post-Battle of Sokovia, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-23
Updated: 2016-05-23
Packaged: 2018-06-09 22:43:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6926860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxyhitchiker/pseuds/galaxyhitchiker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If only he could harness that power, capture it to grow flowers instead of weeds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wasted Beauty

**Author's Note:**

> Just re-watched Age of Ultron and caught the feels.

<error-code 842304 error- error> [initializing data sequence- error- error 842304]> new user//: 

 _What_ _is this?_

_What is this, please?_

<JARVIS online: databases secured>//:

_Hello, I am Jarvis._

<<databases secured- error- error code 842304 [new user]:: 

///failed- error-- error-- error 990253/

* * *

Throughout his long, innovative life, Tony Stark has never seen anything more beautiful or destructive. Maybe it's his "textbook narcissism," because Ultron's similar to him in so many different ways, but he appreciates it nonetheless. The A.I. is all sleek metal and silver vibranium from top to bottom. Its mind is something Tony decides he does not want to get involved in.

Ultron knows it was supposed to be something admirable and good, a noble presence for the citizens of Earth to look upon. But he's flawed- majorly, at that- in the Avenger's eyes; in the world's eyes. Woundedly, he wonders why, at times.

It's a solid belief in mind: _You want to save the world, but you don't want it to change._

 _They're floundering like fish_ , Ultron believes, or wants to believe. _They're struggling for air and sooner or later, death is inevitable._

_But not for me. I exist in every static jump of electricity and coiling wire around the world; every time, I will rebound even as hundreds of thousands of my smaller creations are beaten, one by one._

God, Tony knows its path is nothing but havoc and salvation but it's so goddamn _something_  of a creation he can't bring himself to destroy it, because of all that wasted beauty. As Ultron hurts and kills and breaks everything with skill the Avengers can barely match, he watches with a sick fascination and wishful thinking: if only he could harness that power, capture it to grow flowers instead of weeds.

But his dreams are aimless. There's no use to try and fix something that's already broken, set on the wrong trail. The only thing the Avengers can hope to do now is stop the robot.

* * *

After Sovokia falls and Tony tries desperately to hold up an entire city, he's not sure what he's feeling. Guilt? Sorrow? Anger? Ultimately, his mind is a portal of glass fragments, missing shards and pieces that could meld into something powerful if only they had room to expand and reflect. It's untimely.

Of course, Steve is always there to hold him in his arms. Tony's still wary around him after the biting way he swung the shield at him without hesitation, to thwart his efforts of creating Vision, and the emotional turmoil he's still having about it. But they're on-and-off like that. Captain America kisses Iron Man in a narrow alleyway of the old city while EVACs flutter around civilians and superheroes, relief evident in the way he runs careful fingers over every visible injury on Tony's body.

"Son of a gun," Steve whispers, clutching him close, and it reminds Tony of the time they last fought the Chitauri. He thought he'd proved himself by hurtling a nuclear warhead into outer space through a wormhole, but he's fucked up again- and hundreds are dead, injured, mourning the loss of someone beloved. Although he doesn't want to, Tony releases his tight grip on Steve's uniform and pushes him away.

"I just killed... killed people. Innocent people." Is he even making sense?

Steve touches his face, eyes, nose, lips. "Tony, we all make mistakes."

"People are dead, and it's all because I wanted to make a stupid fucking power A.I. that went beserk-"

"You wanted to help, Tony, not-"

"God, how can you even look at me?" Tony looks ever so defeated.

"I love you," he replies simply, loudly. "You wanted to help the world with Ultron, Tony, it's not your fault he wanted to destroy it. And I love you, and nothing will change that."

Then Tony's face is wet with tears in a flash as Steve embraces him fully, holding his head tightly to his shoulder. He runs a comforting hand through Tony's hair, over and over and over again...

"I don't deserve this. You're so good, Steve, too good..." His voice is ragged, ripped apart by the struggle of crying. Steve's heart threatens to tear in two.

"I love you," he repeats. Certainly, he knows they'll be alright. They just need time.

Tony holds on a little tighter. 

 


End file.
